Dr. Love: Confused
Saturday, August 18th, 2012
Dear Doctor Love,
I have been to Belize twenty times in the last three years. Six of those times have been one-week vacations and the other times were holiday weekends where I get away from my job in the U.S. for four or five days. I love the country, but what keeps me coming back is a man. I met him in the Cayes where he works as a fisherman and a tour guide. Although he is very poor, I helped him by buying a boat for him and he is doing much better now.
I know that he is no saint, but I don’t expect him to be when I am only here for a little bit of the time each year. On my last visit, though, I heard some very disturbing rumors from people who live on the island. Someone told me that he got two of the local girls pregnant. I confronted him about this and he says it is all lies. He says people are just jealous of him because I bought the boat for him.
On this visit, I did not call to contact him before I came down and I made it a surprise visit. When I finally tracked him down, he was at a house with a woman with three children. It was obvious that he lived there, even though he denied it. All of his clothes were there at the house and even his boat motor. He said it is not what it looks like. According to him, he is just staying there because he got kicked out of his room. The woman in the house says that is true and she just gives him a place to stay when he doesn’t have any place to go.
Although we got things straightened out I am still worried. Before I left, I went around and talked to a lot of different people. Some of them said they did not know anything but several of them told me that the woman in that house is his wife and that the children are his. One of them even told me that he has another wife and some children in Sarteneja.
He told me he was not married and the woman in the house said they are not married. I don’t know what to believe any more.
Marriage in Belize is a somewhat nebulous concept. There are formal marriages that take place in church or in civil ceremonies where the ties are legally binding. Living with someone, even for a short period of time can also constitute marriage in the eyes of the law. When two people live together and have children, you can bet they are considered married.
Your story, however, is unique. The Doctor has only heard it forty or fifty times in the last ten years from different gullible people (both male and female) who managed to misplace their trust and their hearts to con artists. Furthermore, these con artists are usually people that they would cross the street to avoid in their own hometown.
The Doctor advises that you take the money for the next vacation to Belize and use it to have your head examined.
Write to the Doctor at:
P.O. Box 35,
San Pedro Town, Belize
Please send your letters. They can be formal letters or handwritten notes. They are edited solely for grammar and spelling. Also, they are sometimes edited for length.
Dr. Love is the island’s and possibly the world’s greatest authority on just about everything. The Doctor answers questions concerning any subject except religion or politics. Persons needing additional assistance or counseling should contact the Family Services Division at 227-7451.