Friday, March 29, 2024

Wolfe’s Woofer: Bad Day at The Drugstore

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Dennis-Wolfe-Wolfes-WoofersAt the drugstore there were three people ahead of me. The pharmacist who waited on us had a bandage on his forehead and he walked with a really bad limp. As I got in line the door burst open and an angry man walked in and shoved his way to the front.
“What’s going on?” the druggist asked him.
“I got home this afternoon and found my wife crying. She said you insulted her on the phone about something she bought from you yesterday. Now I want an apology.”
“Let me explain,” the druggist said. “My alarm clock didn’t go off this morning. I was twenty minutes late leaving home so I didn’t even get breakfast. I ran out to my golf cart and found one of the tires flat. Then I found that I had left my keys in the house and the door was locked. I had to break my front window to get back in.”
“Well, that no excuse for. . . .” the angry customer said.
“Hold on,” the druggist said. “Let me finish. There was a crowd of twelve customers waiting for me when I finally opened and all of them were upset. The phone was ringing and it didn’t stop for twenty minutes straight while I waited on the customers in the store. In the meantime I dropped the change drawer and had to get down on my hands and knees to gather it up. When I stood up I hit my head on the drawer and cut it open. In the meantime that phone kept ringing.”
He breathed a big sigh and then said, “When I hit my heads on the drawer I staggered backwards and knocked a sunglasses display over. I managed to break fourteen pairs of eighty dollar sunglasses and sprain my ankle. The entire time that phone kept ringing.”
“What does this have to do with my wife?” the customer asked.
The druggist said, “The whole time all of this was going on that damn phone kept ringing. I finally picked it up and it was your wife wanting instructions on how to use a rectal thermometer. Well, sir, I told her.”

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