This week, our ever-busy local realtor, Christian Guerrero, was showing a tourist some “beachfront” properties.
House #1: The guy looks around and says, “But this isn’t beachfront.” Christian grins: “Sure it is the beach is right there, just squint past the mangroves and pretend.”
House #2: One lot over, nice spot… except there’s a big wooden house blocking the ocean. The guy frowns, “But I can’t see the sea from here.” Christian shrugs: “Don’t worry, you will right after the next hurricane.”
House #3: Finally, Christian takes him to a condo with a “panoramic view.” They get to the roof, the tourist looks out and says, “Wait… that’s a cemetery.” Christian beams: “Exactly! Ocean in the front, eternal peace in the back. And hey you’ll never have to worry about the neighbors playing music too loud.”
The events and characters depicted in Wolfe’s Woofer by Melody S. Wolfe are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. The column is intended for satire and entertainment purposes only.
