I was up on an arbor, zip ties in my mouth, when my brother Dennis showed up.
Early.
Like forty minutes early.
That alone told me something was wrong.
He leaned on his guitar, watching me work.
With all this extra time, he started entertaining himself.
“Hey Melody, is the minister’s name Alfredo”
“No, Dennis. We’ve been in the wedding industry our whole lives. You know the minister’s name is Eiden.”
“Yeah, but too bad,” he said. “If it was Alfredo, he would be Pasta Alfredo.”
He laughed.
I had zip ties in my mouth and flowers in my hands and rolled my eyes.
Then he looked up at me and said,
“So… why you running late?”
I looked at Dennis confused cuz I wasn’t late…
Then realized and I looked over at Mariel, talking to the groom. Clipboard. Calm. Not saying a word.
And that’s when I realized
Dennis wasn’t early.
He was on Mariel Time… and I was going to hear Pasta Alfredo jokes for another thirty minutes.
The events and characters depicted in Wolfe’s Woofers by Melody S. Wolfe are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. The column is intended for satire and entertainment purposes only.
