Dear Doctor Love,
I have a close friend who holds opposing views on religion. Despite these differences, we avoid debating or arguing about this subject and still find common ground in our conversations. She recently asked me to support the church group she founded and runs. While I admire her initiative and efforts, I do not financially support this organization. Although I contribute to several charities regularly, I choose them carefully. I am unsure how to explain my decision not to help her organization politely. She should understand that I would do so independently if I supported it. I am conflicted about handling this situation without compromising my principles for the sake of our friendship. /s/ About the donation
Dear About the donation,
It’s wonderful that you and your friend can maintain a close relationship despite differing views. This speaks to the strength of your bond. When it comes to her request, honesty, wrapped in kindness, is your best approach. Let her know that while you respect and admire her passion, you have personal criteria for choosing which causes to support, and this particular group doesn’t align with your giving philosophy. Emphasize your support for her as a friend, not necessarily for her organization. True friendship allows space for these kinds of boundaries without compromising the relationship. /s/ Dr. Love
Dear Doctor Love,
I am expecting my first child. But rather than being excited and happy for me, my mother kept bringing up all these negative comments because I am not in a relationship with the baby’s father. It’s like she wants me to regret having a baby. I want to be excited about this baby, but my mother keeps dragging me down. How do I get through to her? /s/ First Baby
Dear First Baby,
It’s difficult when a time meant for joy is overshadowed by someone else’s worries. Your mother’s concerns likely come from a place of love and fear for your future, but they’re not helping you or the baby. Be open with her about how her comments are affecting you. Tell her that while you understand her concerns, you need her support and positivity right now. Make it clear that this is your journey, and you want to focus on the love and excitement of welcoming your child. Hopefully, she’ll come around when she sees how much this means to you. /s/ Dr. Love
Dear Dr. Love.
I want a dog, but I am conflicted about whether to get a puppy or adopt from Saga. I understand that I would be helping out my community by giving a home to a homeless dog, but wouldn’t I be missing out on getting the actual dog I want? /s/To adopt or not to adopt
Dear To adopt or not to adopt,
It’s great that you’re thinking this through. Both options have their unique joys and challenges. A puppy gives you the chance to shape their behavior from the start, but it’s also a lot of work. Adopting from Saga can be incredibly rewarding; you’re giving a dog a second chance and often, these dogs are just as loving and loyal as any you’d raise from a pup. Consider visiting the shelter and meeting some of the dogs there. You might find that the right dog chooses you, and it might not be the breed or age you expected. Go with an open heart, and you’ll make the right decision. /s/ Dr. Love
Doctor Love is the islands, and possibly the world’s greatest authority on just about everything. The Doctor answers questions concerning any subject except religion or politics. Persons needing additional assistance or counseling should contact Family Services Division at 227-7541. The opinions herein are not necessarily of The San Pedro Sun. Write Doctor Love at PO Box 51, San Pedro Town, Belize, or email: [email protected]
