Tuesday, February 18, 2025

Doctor Love: A bossy friend

Share

Dear Doctor Love,
I have a close group of friends, but recently my mom mentioned that I tend to be a bit bossy towards them, and I should be careful not to alienate them. I’m not sure if this is true. How should I address this with my friends? I don’t want to risk losing our friendship. /s/ A bossy friend

Dear Bossy Friend,
A wise soul once said, “True friends are like mirrors; they reflect your best and sometimes your rough edges too.” If your mom noticed this, it’s worth exploring with humility rather than defensiveness. Start with an open and honest conversation. Say something like, “I value our friendship so much, and I’ve been reflecting on whether I sometimes come across as bossy. If I ever do, I want to be aware and do better. What do you think?”
Approach it as an act of love, not guilt. If they say yes, don’t beat yourself up—just ask them to kindly call you out when it happens. Self-awareness and willingness to grow deepen friendships, not threaten them. /s Dr. Love

Dear Doctor Love,
Phones seem to have invaded my home. I live with my two teenagers (14 and 17) and my husband, and every year, their attachment to technology seems to get worse. I didn’t notice this issue when my kids were younger, but now, as teenagers, I can barely get their attention when they’re home. The more I observe my daughters glued to their phones, the more I realize that my husband also spends a significant amount of time on his phone. I can’t even have a proper conversation with any of them. I’ve tried punishing the girls by taking away their phones, but that only causes animosity in the house. This problem persists even when we go out to restaurants; they are always on their phones. What should I do? I’m starting to feel like I should just give up and let them do what they want. /s/ Glued to phones

Dear Glued to Phones,
Let’s breathe for a moment, because this isn’t just a family issue—it’s a modern world challenge. Punishing or nagging only feeds resistance; instead, aim for connection over correction. Try this: establish a “tech-free” ritual that applies to everyone, including you. Start small—maybe a “no phones at dinner” rule or a 30-minute family game or chat session in the evening. Frame it as something that strengthens the family bond, not as a punishment. Your role isn’t to fight technology but to model balance. If they see you present, attentive, and creating fun moments offline, they might be more inclined to join in. Remember, seeds of change grow slowly, but consistency will nurture them. /s/ Dr. Love

Dear Doctor Love,
I am what you call an expat, even though I don’t like that term. I have been living here in Belize for 15 years and absolutely love it. In the past year, I have noticed a trend with “new” expats moving into our condominium complex. And it’s that they complain about everything that is distinctly Belize. From the little bugs to the live music down the street. It’s like they don’t like Belize. I am dumbfounded as to why they even chose to live here if they don’t seem to like it so much. These people don’t seem to interact with the local community and make a clear distinction that they are expats. I often think about telling them something but also don’t want to get involved. What is your opinion on these situations? /s/ Embrace living abroad

Dear Embrace Living Abroad,
Living in Belize is a different experience. I like to say Belize is like a song that doesn’t change its tune for anyone—you either learn the rhythm or you miss the beauty. Your frustration is understandable, but remember, not everyone’s journey into this culture will look like yours.
Instead of directly addressing their complaints, led by example. Invite them to a local event or introduce them to Belizean culture in a way that’s warm and inviting. Sometimes, people resist because they feel unsure or disconnected. A gentle nudge toward embracing the Belizean spirit might plant a seed of openness. But if they choose to stay stuck in negativity, let that be their journey—not yours. Stay rooted in your love for this paradise and let them figure out if it’s truly their tune. /s/ Dr. Love

Doctor Love is the islands, and possibly the world’s greatest authority on just about everything. The Doctor answers questions concerning any subject except religion or politics. Persons needing additional assistance or counseling should contact Family Services Division at 227-7541. The opinions herein are not necessarily of The San Pedro Sun. Write Doctor Love at PO Box 51, San Pedro Town, Belize, or email: [email protected]

Read more

 

Please help support Local Journalism in Belize

For the first time in the history of the island's community newspaper, The San Pedro Sun is appealing to their thousands of readers to help support the paper during the COVID-19 pandemic. Since 1991 we have tirelessly provided vital local and national news. Now, more than ever, our community depends on us for trustworthy reporting, but our hard work comes with a cost. We need your support to keep delivering the news you rely on each and every day. Every reader contribution, however big or small, is so valuable. Please support us by making a contribution.

Local News