Wolfe’s Woofers: Wine and Sophistication

Sunday, June 2nd, 2013

Dennis-Wolfe-Wolfes-Woofers“Good morning, Dick,” I said. “Pull up a chair.”

I was sitting at a table on the deck of the Holiday Hotel sipping my coffee and feasting on Dario’s meat pies from Celi’s Deli.

“What are you up to today?” Dick asked.

“Absolutely nothing. It’s my day off and I’m going to waste it completely.”

“Since it’s your day off you should go to the wine tasting party tonight.”

“I don’t even drink wine,” I said. “Since I don’t care for the taste why should I go to a party where they sit around tasting it?”

“You can go to keep me company,” Dick said. “I really go to meet ladies. You always meet the sophisticated ones there.”

“I definitely don’t want to meet any ladies,” I said, “but I’ll go with you just to satisfy my curiosity about a wine tasting.”

That evening I found a wine that I could swallow without choking and Dick and I mingled with the crowd.

“Ah, there’s one I’d like to meet,” Dick said. “She’s elegant and sophisticated.”

He indicated a beautiful older woman who had just walked in alone

“She looks elegant,” I said, “but I don’t see how you know she’s sophisticated.”

“Ladies at a wine tasting are always sophisticated,” he said. “I’m going to invite her to join us.”

“Dennis, this is Sharon,” he said, when he led her over. “Sharon, the wine tasting tonight is focusing on sherry and port. Which do you prefer?”

“Let me think for a moment before deciding,” she said. “I love the taste of both wines.”

“Just let me know which one,” Dick said.

“It’s a really hard decision,” the lady said. “When I drink port, I become romantic. I want to write poetry. I think of soft summer nights, palm trees on a moonlit beach and flowers. On the other hand, when I drink sherry, I fart.”


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