Woofer: Honeymooners

Sunday, February 9th, 2014

Dennis-Wolfe-Wolfes-Woofers“Hi. We’re on our honeymoon,” the little blonde at the next table said to me.

“Congratulations to you both,” I said.

“We’ve been engaged for a year,” the newlywed husband said. “I finally made an honest woman of her.”

I turned back to my coffee and book while I waited for Charlie, deciding to leave the honeymooners alone. We always meet at the deck of the Holiday Hotel.

“Oh, here comes the fishing guide with my rods and reels,” the husband said.

“I got them cleaned and oiled for you,” the guide said. “I’ll be back to pick you up in half an hour.”

“Ah, my babies,” the man said, picking up one of the rods. “I love my rods and reels and I love fishing more than anything.”

“It’s a pretty expensive hobby,” his wife said. “That fishing guide cost us $150 yesterday.”

“I don’t mind the cost. This Penn Billfisher rod and reel combo just set me back $175 and I have ten others that cost even more.”

“You know, hon,” his wife said, “Now that we’re married maybe you should give up fishing.”

“Oh, my God!” her husband said, with a horrified look on his face. “You’re starting to sound like my ex-wife.”

“What ex-wife?!” the new bride screamed. “You never said you were married before you married me!”

“I wasn’t.”


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