Friday, July 12, 2024

Wolfe’s Woofer: What Smell? What Noise?

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Dennis-Wolfe-Wolfes-Woofers“It’s time for you to go to the doctor for a checkup,” Sherry said.
“What?”
“I said it’s time for you to get a checkup.”
“A checkup? Why do I need a checkup?”
“One good reason is that you were in the hospital only nine months ago. When you have been sick enough to go to a hospital then you need regular checkups.”
“All right, that’s one good reason,” I said. “Are there any other reasons I should know about?”
“You have other problems that Doctor Renae can help with,” she said. “The main one that concerns me is flatulence.”
“The main one is what? I didn’t hear that.”
“Flatulence. You are constantly passing gas.”
“Me?! Not a chance.”
“You woke me from a sound sleep last night,” she said. “And it smelled terrible.”
“Not me. It must have been Dali.”
“Dennis Wolfe, don’t try to blame it on my poor little dog. She has to suffer through it, too.”
The sign on the door read Doctor Renae Berg Sersland.
“I thought this is Doctor Lerida’s office,” I said, as we went inside.
“Doctor Renae works out of here,” Sherry told me.
I was led into the examination room, followed closely by Sherry. When Doctor Renae came in she examined me thoroughly. She even examined things that I did not want examined by anyone.
When she finished Sherry asked, “Well Doctor, what’s the verdict?”
“Oh, he’s fine except for a few minor things,” she said. “We can take care of the flatulence problem with a change in diet?”
“Did I hear you correctly?” I said. “Believe me, I do not a have problem with passing gas.”
Ignoring me, Doctor Renae turned to Sherry and said, “We’ll change his diet first. Then I’ll work on his nose and we will fit him up with a hearing aid.”

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