The San Pedro Sun

Wolfe’s Woofer: Going Deaf

“Let’s go to Miglio’s for lunch,” Sherry said.
“Amelia? Who is Amelia.”
“Miglio. M-I-G-L-I-O,” she spelled. “Up at his resort at Ak’Bol. You know, we really need to get your hearing checked.”
“I never write checks,” I told her. “What check are you talking about?”
“Forget it.”
When we left home Sherry was saying something and she said it all the way to Ak’Bol. I tuned it out and every once in a while I said, “Yeah,” or “Uh huh.” When she’s wound up Sherry can talk.
Miglio was glad to see us. After lunch he brought out a guitar.
“Check out this guitar,” he told me.
“That is a real beauty,” I told him, after playing it awhile. “This would be great for some recording I’m doing.”
“Take it with you,” he insisted, as we left. “You can bring it back in a couple of weeks.”
“You know this means you’ll have to ride in the back of the golf cart,” I told Sherry. “I can’t leave this bouncing around back there.”
When we left Ak’Bol Sherry picked up her conversation where she left it off and soon I was saying “Yes,” and grunting every once in a while. Whenever she quit talking I would say “Un huh,” and she would soon start talking again.
“Hey! Hey!” someone shouted at me just before I reached the bridge. “Wait!”
When I stopped the golf cart another cart pulled up next to me. Sherry was sitting in the golf cart and she did not look happy.
“Mister,” the man driving the golf cart said, “Your wife fell out of the cart about a mile and a half back.”
“Thank God” I said. “I thought I had gone completely deaf.”