Wolfe’s Woofer: Nightmares
Sunday, August 2nd, 2015
“Do you want another bowl of chili?” Sherry asked.
“Yes, but I don’t think I’ll have one,” I told her.
“Why not? You don’t like it?”
“I love it. This is probably the tastiest batch of chili that you’ve ever made.”
“If you like it so much then why not have another bowl?”
“Because it’s so late,” I said. “It’s already after eleven o’clock. Remember, last Wednesday I ate two bowls full before I went to bed. That night I had some of the worst dreams of my entire life.”
“And you think your bad dreams were caused by my chili?”
“That’s the only thing I can think of that would cause it.”
“I’m not sure whether to be insulted,” she said. “I’m having a bowl whether you want one or not.”
“Oh, get me one, too,” I said.
Three hours later I was sitting naked in church on Sunday morning. By the time I realized it was just a bad dream my heart was racing and my entire body was sweating. Then I heard Sherry cry out in her sleep.
“I told her that chili caused nightmares,” I said to myself.
She suddenly began to sob violently and I shook her awake.
“Oh, my God!” she said. “I had a dream that a powerful, handsome multi-millionaire had kidnapped me away from you.”
“It’s all right, dear,” I said. “It was just a dream.”
She said, “I know. That’s why I’m crying.”
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