Wolfe’s Woofer: Who Changes The Child?

Sunday, October 2nd, 2016

Dennis-Wolfe-Wolfes-Woofers“What are you so upset about?” Sherry asked.
“It’s Mario,” I told her. “He was supposed to be here at eight o’clock to help me clean up the bodega.”
“Since it’s already nine-thirty I would say he is not coming over today.”
“Oh, yes he is. I’m going to his house to get him.”
When Lupe answered the door I said, “Ms. Lupe, where is Mario? He was supposed to work with me today.”
“I don’t think he will work with you today,” Lupe said. “When he wakes up his head will be hurting a lot.”
“He’s going to have a hangover?” I asked.
“A really bad one. He was so drunk last night I did not let him in the house. He spent the night on the back porch so I’d better go check on him before his mother gets here. If there is anything wrong with him that old witch will blame it on me.”
She returned just as Mario’s mother came in. After kissing her six month-old grandson she said, “Oh, the baby is beautiful. Where is my Mario?
“He is on the back porch, Suegra,” Lupe said. “Before you go out there can I ask you a question about children?”
“Of course, mi amor. Anything.”
Lupe said, “When the child poops himself who cleans him up and changes him? Is it the mother or the father?”
“Oh, the mother always does that,” the mother-in-law said. “It’s her duty.”
“Oh, that is so good to hear,” Lupe said. “Your child, Mario, got drunk last night and crapped all over himself. You’ll find him on the back porch.”


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