Wolfe’s Woofer: Just Like Mama

Sunday, October 15th, 2017

“Rafael, I saw your mama last week at the water taxi and we was talking,” Mario said. “She says you looking to get married.”
“Looking ain’t the same as getting,” Rafa said. “I been looking to get married for the last two years but I ain’t been getting married. It never works out.”
We were sitting at the big picnic table at the rice and beans restaurant where I always take Mario for lunch when he’s working for me.
“Why don’t it work out?”
“Because my mama never likes any of the girls I bring home.”
“What about when you was going out with Marisela? That was one good-looking woman. Your mama didn’t like her?”
“Not one little bit. She said a woman like that means I’ll have to fight all the time to keep the mens away from her. She didn’t like Rosa from Ignacio because she says her family got a bad reputation. She said Estrella was way too quiet and she said . . .”
“Rafa, I know what you need,” Mario said, interrupting him. “You need a woman just like your Ma. That’s the only way she’s ever going to be happy.”
“I found one,” Raphael said. “She thinks like my Ma, she acts like her, she talks like her and she even looks like her.”
“She’s fat and old?” Mario asked.
“No, stupid. She looks like my Ma did when she was young. I’m bringing her home to dinner tonight.”
That conversation took place yesterday. Today at noon Raphael joined us again at the picnic table.
Mario said, “Rafa, I saw that gal you took home for dinner last night. You’re right. She does look like your Ma and talk and act like her. I guess you’ll be getting married soon, hunh?”
“Not to her, I won’t,” Rafa said.
“Your Ma didn’t like her?”
“My Ma liked her but my Pa didn’t like anything about her at all.”

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