Dear Doctor Love,
I work at one of the big resorts on the island, and what should be a dream job has turned into a nightmare. The work itself is fine, I love dealing with guests and take pride in what I do, but my coworkers make every day miserable. The gossip never stops, some people are two-faced, and a few go out of their way to make others look bad in front of management. I’ve even seen good staff quit because of the constant drama.
I try to stay out of it and just do my job, but the negativity is starting to wear me down. I’m not sure if I should talk to my supervisor or just start looking for another job. I really don’t want to lose my paycheck, but I also don’t want to lose my peace of mind. What should I do? /s/ Tired of the Toxic Crew
Dear Tired of the Toxic Crew,
It happens alot in all work places the “paradise job” that starts to feel like purgatory. Here’s the thing work doesn’t always break us because of the job itself, but because of the people around us. Some folks thrive on drama; it gives them a sense of power and distraction. Don’t let that energy pull you in.
You’ve already done the first wise thing you stay out of it. Keep doing that. Protect your peace like it’s your paycheck, because honestly, both pay the bills in their own way.
Before you jump ship, quietly check your options. Maybe another department or resort might suit you better. And if things get unbearable, have a calm talk with your supervisor not to gossip, but to express that you want to keep doing your best without getting dragged into nonsense.
Remember, you can’t fix toxic people, but you can decide how close you stand to the fumes. /s Dr. Love
Dear Doctor Love,
There’s this guy I’ve been seeing for a few months, and things seemed serious at first. He messages me every day, introduces me to his friends, and even brings me lunch at work sometimes. But lately, he’s been “too busy” to hang out and takes hours to reply. When I ask if something’s wrong, he says, “No, baby, just tired.” My friends say he’s losing interest, but I don’t want to jump to conclusions. How do I know if I’m being patient or just being played? /w/ Left Wondering
Dear Left Wondering,
When someone wants you, you don’t have to wonder. It’s that simple. Love or even just genuine interest doesn’t need decoding. It’s consistent, not convenient.
That said, not everyone pulls away because they’re done. Sometimes life gets heavy, and people get quiet. So give it a little space but not endless space. Let his actions tell you what his words won’t.
If the energy that used to come your way is gone for good, don’t chase it. You deserve someone who shows up even when they’re tired, not only when it’s easy. The right person won’t make you feel like you’re asking for too much they’ll make you feel like you finally found peace. /s/ Dr. Love
Dear Doctor Love,
My husband and my brother can’t stand each other, and it’s making family gatherings miserable. Every time we host a BBQ or go out together, they end up arguing about something small… politics, football, or even about their jobs, they are both tour guides. I love them both, but I’m tired of being stuck in the middle. How can I make peace between two grown men who act like they’re in primary school? /s/ Fed Up Sister
Dear Fed Up Sister,
You’ve got two men who think they’re captains, both trying to steer the same boat. The truth is, you can’t force peace between people who secretly enjoy the war.
Here’s your move: step out of the middle. Make it clear that family gatherings are about love, not ego. Tell them both that if they can’t act like grown men, they can stay home. Simple as that.
You can’t make them like each other, but you can set the tone for your space. They’ll either learn to behave, or they’ll miss out and either way, your peace returns. Sometimes the only way to win is to stop playing referee and let folks sit in the silence they create. /s/ Dr. Love
Doctor Love is the islands, and possibly the world’s greatest authority on just about everything. The Doctor answers questions concerning any subject except religion or politics. Persons needing additional assistance or counseling should contact Family Services Division at 227-7541. The opinions herein are not necessarily of The San Pedro Sun. Write Doctor Love at PO Box 51, San Pedro Town, Belize, or email: [email protected]
