Dear Doctor Love,
I’ve been married for over ten years, and while we still love each other, the spark isn’t what it used to be. Between work, kids, and everyday stress, intimacy has slowly taken a back seat. I miss feeling desired, but I don’t know how to bring it up without sounding ungrateful or starting an argument. Is it normal to want more excitement at this stage of life, and how do I talk about it without hurting my partner? /s/ Sad Housewife
Dear Housewife,
Yes, it’s normal. Very normal. Love doesn’t disappear, but desire can get buried under laundry, schedules, and exhaustion.
The tricky part isn’t wanting more it’s how you say it. Don’t lead with what’s missing. Lead with what you miss. There’s a big difference between “we never…” and “I miss feeling close to you.” One sounds like blame. The other sounds like truth.
Pick a calm moment, not during an argument or at bedtime when everyone’s half-asleep. Say it plain and soft. You’re not asking for fireworks every night. You’re asking to feel seen again.
And remember long marriages don’t lose spark because something is wrong. They lose spark because life gets loud. Sometimes all it takes is one honest conversation to turn the volume back down.
Desire doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful. It means you’re still alive in the relationship.
Just something to sit with. /s/ Dr. Love
Dear Doctor Love, (Parenting)
I’m raising children in a very different world than the one I grew up in. When was young, parents mi strict and pickni know fi listen when adult talk. Now it feel like every child have a phone, social media, and plenty outside influence telling them how fi think and act. I want to raise my children with love and understanding, but I don’t want them to grow up without respect or discipline. Everybody got an opinion bout parenting now, and sometimes it confusing. How do parents today find di balance between being firm and being fair? /s/ Parenting in 2026
Dear Parenting,
You’re right the world changed, but children still need the same two things: love and limits.
Being firm doesn’t mean being harsh. And being loving doesn’t mean letting everything slide. Kids feel safest when they know where the line is and that the line doesn’t move just because they argue loud or cry harder.
The phones and social media? That’s noise. You can’t control all of it, but you can control what happens in your house. Respect is still taught the same way it always was: consistency. Say what you mean, mean what you say, and don’t threaten what you won’t follow through on.
Ignore the outside opinions. Half the people talking loud online not even raising their own children properly.
Raise your kids so they know they’re loved and also know when “no” means no. That balance isn’t trendy, but it works.
At the end of the day, children don’t need perfect parents. They need present ones. /s/ Dr. Love
Dear Doctor Love,
I’m feeling overwhelmed by the amount of paperwork and procedures required for almost everything in Belize—whether it’s licenses, permits, land matters, or even simple approvals. It often feels slow, confusing, and frustrating, especially when rules change or information isn’t clear. I try to stay patient, but the stress is affecting my mood and relationships. How do I cope with the system without letting it consume my peace? /s/ Paperwork in Belize
Dear Paperwork,
You’re not weak you’re just tired. And the system here can wear down even the calmest person.
So stop expecting it to make sense. That expectation alone causes half the frustration. Things move slow. Rules change mid-process. One office says yes, another says come back tomorrow. That’s reality, not a personal attack.
Break it into pieces. One task per day if you can. When you leave an office, write down exactly who you spoke to and what they said. That alone saves stress later.
Also protect your mood. Don’t bring office anger home if you can help it. Go take a walk. Sit by the sea. Vent to one trusted person, not everybody.
The system might not change soon, but how much space it takes in your head can.
Paperwork will get done eventually. Your peace is harder to replace.
Take that with you. /s/ Dr. Love
Doctor Love is the islands, and possibly the world’s greatest authority on just about everything. The Doctor answers questions concerning any subject except religion or politics. Persons needing additional assistance or counseling should contact Family Services Division at 227-7541. The opinions herein are not necessarily of The San Pedro Sun. Write Doctor Love at PO Box 51, San Pedro Town, Belize, or email: [email protected]
