Doctor Love,
The New Year has me reflecting on my relationship, and honestly, I’m not sure if we’re growing together anymore. We live on the island, work long hours in tourism, and barely spend quality time together. Is it realistic to expect change in the new year, or is it time to accept that we’ve grown apart? /s/ Love and Work
Dear Love and Work,
Island life and tourism hours can wear a relationship down without anyone doing anything “wrong.” Long days turn into late nights, and “we’ll talk later” quietly turns into months. Many of us have been there.
A new year doesn’t fix that by itself. People do.
Before you decide you’ve grown apart, ask yourself this: when you do get a quiet moment together, does it still feel good? Or does it feel like you’re sitting next to someone you used to know?
If there’s still warmth there even a little change is possible. But only if both of you admit something’s off and actually protect time for each other. Not when work slows down. It usually doesn’t.
If the idea of trying feels heavier than the idea of letting go, that’s something to pay attention to too.
Sometimes relationships don’t end with a blowup. Sometimes life just keeps getting louder, and nobody pulls the brakes. /s/ Doctor Love
Doctor Love,
Living in a close-knit Belizean community has always been a blessing for me, especially when it comes to family. But when it comes to my relationship, it sometimes feels like everyone has an opinion—what I should do, who I should be with, and how fast things should move. Advice comes from all directions: parents, aunties, cousins, neighbors, and even people who barely know the full story.
I’m craving peace and emotional space, but I don’t want to come across as rude or ungrateful. In our culture, family respect is deeply important, and speaking up can feel like disrespect, even when it’s not meant that way. I find myself stressed, second-guessing my decisions, and sometimes arguing with my partner because of outside voices.
How do I set healthy boundaries with family while still honoring Belizean values and keeping family harmony? Is it possible to protect my relationship without creating tension or drama, especially in a community where privacy is hard to come by? /s/ Family Boundaries
Dear Family Boundaries,
This is a very real Belizean struggle, and you’re not imagining it.
Family advice usually comes from love but love doesn’t always come with restraint. Setting boundaries doesn’t mean you don’t respect your family. It means you’re taking responsibility for your own life.
You don’t need long explanations. Simple, calm phrases work best: “We’re handling it.”
“So far, we’re okay.”
“I’ll ask if I need advice.”
Say it kindly. Say it once. Repeat it if you have to. Don’t argue your choices arguing invites debate, and debate invites the whole village.
Also, be mindful of how much you share. The less detail people have, the less they can weigh in. Privacy isn’t secrecy. It’s protection.
You can honor your family and still decide that your relationship isn’t a community project.
Peace comes from choosing whose voices you let guide you. /s/ Doctor Love
Doctor Love,
As the new year starts, I keep telling myself that this is the year I will finally put my health and wellness first. Living in Belize, especially on the island, life can move fast—long work hours, late nights, weekend events, and plenty of food and drinks everywhere you turn. Between work, family responsibilities, and trying to make ends meet, taking care of myself often ends up last on the list.
I know I should be eating better, moving more, resting properly, and managing stress, but it feels hard to stay consistent. Sometimes it even feels selfish to slow down when everyone else depends on you. I want to be healthier not just for myself, but for my family and future.
How can I realistically prioritize my health and wellness this year without feeling guilty or overwhelmed? What small, practical steps can someone in a busy Belizean lifestyle take to build healthier habits that actually last? /s/ Putting Health First
Dear Putting Health First,
Let’s be real – running yourself into the ground has been normalized here. That doesn’t mean it’s healthy.
Taking care of yourself doesn’t start with a big plan. It starts with permission.
Permission to drink water before another drink.
Permission to eat one decent meal a day.
Permission to move your body a little -walking counts.
Permission to leave one event early without apologizing.
That’s how real habits start. Small and repeatable.
Feeling guilty for resting is usually a sign you’ve been needed for a long time without being cared for. The people who depend on you don’t need you exhausted. They need you steady.
You don’t have to change your whole life this year. You just have to stop putting yourself dead last.
Take care of yourself like someone you plan to keep around. /s/ Doctor Love
Doctor Love is the islands, and possibly the world’s greatest authority on just about everything. The Doctor answers questions concerning any subject except religion or politics. Persons needing additional assistance or counseling should contact Family Services Division at 227-7541. The opinions herein are not necessarily of The San Pedro Sun. Write Doctor Love at PO Box 51, San Pedro Town, Belize, or email: [email protected]
