Wolfe’s Woofer: Psychiatric Seminar
Sunday, December 25th, 2016
Dale brought his cup of coffee over to my table at the Holiday Hotel and took a seat.
“Hey, Wolfe.” he said. “About six years ago a psychiatrist came to the Lion’s Den for a seminar. He handed out a bunch of those weird psychiatric tests. Do you remember that?”
“Remember? Hell, I’m still embarrassed about it.”
The psychiatrist had given us a short test of words with missing letters like BOO_S, P_N_S, _ _NDOM, F_ _K and S_X. The correct answers were BOOKS, PANTS,
RANDOM, FORK and SIX. To my humiliation I had failed to get one correct answer.
Dale said, “I ran into that psychiatrist this morning. He’s giving a seminar at the Lion’s Den this afternoon and he invited us to go. He specifically asked if you are O.K.”
“He would. He probably thinks I’m some crazy old pervert.”
After the seminar Doctor Robinson, the psychiatrist, asked if anyone had any questions. He answered a number of them and then he mentioned me by name.
“Mr. Wolfe,” he called. “I remember you from my last visit. How have you been?”
“U-h-h, fine. I guess.”
“You’ve been very quiet this afternoon. Do you have any questions for me?”
I had been quiet because I didn’t want to act the fool like I did before. I quickly came up with an intelligent sounding question.
“Uh.h.h, how do you detect a mental deficiency in someone who appears normal?”
“That’s simple,” Doctor Robinson said. “I ask them a question like the one I will ask you. Captain Cook, the great discoverer, sailed around the earth three times before he died. The question is, on which voyage did he die?”
“I’m sorry, Doctor,” I said. “Can you ask me a different question? I don’t know much about history.”
Please help support Local Journalism in Belize
For the first time in the history of the island's community newspaper, The San Pedro Sun is appealing to their thousands of readers to help support the paper during the COVID-19 pandemic. Since 1991 we have tirelessly provided vital local and national news. Now, more than ever, our community depends on us for trustworthy reporting, but our hard work comes with a cost. We need your support to keep delivering the news you rely on each and every day. Every reader contribution, however big or small, is so valuable. Please support us by making a contribution.Click to Donate
Follow The San Pedro Sun News on Twitter, become a fan on Facebook. Stay updated via RSS