Dear Doctor Love,
I moved to the island a year ago because I fell in love with the “go slow” lifestyle. The sun, the sea, the laid-back people, it was exactly what I thought I needed. But now I’m finding myself frustrated more often than not. Last week, my water pump broke – for context, I live all the way up north and I am not connected to the water line. I called the repair guy, and he said he’d come “mañana.” Four mañanas later, still no show. I finally gave up and tried someone else, same story. Meanwhile, I’m lugging buckets of water like I’m in the 1800s. I get that people are on island time, and I really do try to respect the culture. But sometimes things need to get done. Whether it’s waiting in a never-ending government office line, trying to get someone to show up for a scheduled appointment, or just getting a basic service handled, it feels like no one has any urgency. Am I being uptight and need to chill out? Or is there a way to respectfully get things moving around here without turning into the “pushy mainlander”? /s/ Frustrated with Go Slow
Frustrated,
Welcome to the real island life. It’s one thing to love the go slow vibe, but quite another to live it when there’s no water to wash your dishes or yourself. You’re not uptight for wanting your basic needs met. You’re human.
But you’re also learning what we all learn eventually – mañana doesn’t mean tomorrow. It means “not today.” The only way around it is persistence with kindness. Call in the morning. Call again after lunch. Send a friendly WhatsApp in the evening. Be polite, be warm, but keep asking. People here move for relationships, not urgency. I find that giving anyone a cold coke keeps you at the top of their list.
And when you finally find that one plumber or electrician who actually shows up when they say they will, treat them like gold. Because on this island, they are.
Keep your humour close and your buckets closer. /s/ Dr. Love
Dear Doctor Love,
What started as a casual fling with a married man has turned into something deeper (at least for me). He says he’s unhappy at home and is “working on leaving,” but months have passed and nothing has changed. Am I wasting my time… or could this end in real love? /s/ Forbidden love
Forbidden love,
I’ll tell you straight. If he really wanted to leave, he already would have. Men don’t stay where they’re miserable unless it’s easier than leaving.
You’re holding onto hope because it feels good to believe he might choose you. But his actions are choosing to keep things exactly how they are – you on the side, him at home. Love shouldn’t make you feel hidden or like an option.
You deserve to be with someone who is free to love you fully, not just in secret moments.
Be honest with yourself about what you truly want. Because if it’s real love, I don’t think you’ll find it here. /s/ Dr. Love
Dear Doctor Love,
I’ve lived on San Pedro for most of my life and now have two young kids of my own. I love this island, and there’s nowhere else I’d rather raise my family, but wow, it’s getting expensive. School fees, uniforms, books, lunches, after-school activities… it all adds up fast. And that’s before we even get to basics like groceries, diapers, or medical expenses. Just last month, I spent nearly $400 on registration and fees to enroll my kids in what is considered a “public school”. I still have to cover all the other back-to-school costs. Even everyday things like healthy food or clothes feel like luxuries. I try to budget carefully, but with prices going up and wages staying the same, it’s a constant juggling act. I see other parents managing somehow, and I can’t help but wonder: how are they doing it? Am I missing something? Are there secrets to surviving (and maybe even thriving) while raising a family here without going broke? Or is this just the reality of island life that we all silently struggle through? /s/ Financially Drained
Dear Financially Drained,
You’re not missing anything – you’re seeing the truth. Raising kids here is hard. Most parents are silently juggling just like you. Some get help from family, some have side hustles, some buy everything secondhand, some skip meals themselves so their kids never feel it. Some are drowning in quiet debt, hoping next month is kinder.
There are no magic secrets. But there is community. Talk to other parents honestly. Share hand-me-downs. Buy in bulk together. Trade babysitting or rides to school. Focus on what truly matters: your kids knowing they’re loved, safe, and cared for.
This island has a way of humbling all of us. But remember, your kids won’t remember how brand new their shoes were. They’ll remember your love, your presence, and the way you made life feel okay even when times were tight.
You’re not failing. You’re just living the real life behind all the pretty Instagram sunsets. /s/ Dr. Love
Doctor Love is the islands, and possibly the world’s greatest authority on just about everything. The Doctor answers questions concerning any subject except religion or politics. Persons needing additional assistance or counseling should contact Family Services Division at 227-7541. The opinions herein are not necessarily of The San Pedro Sun. Write Doctor Love at PO Box 51, San Pedro Town, Belize, or email: [email protected]
