Tuesday, May 21, 2024

Wolfe’s Woofer: Fisherman’s Secret


“Happy birthday Don Carlos. Happy birthday to you!”
The crowd at Señor Garza’s 103rd birthday party clapped and cheered. The old fisherman was one of the first people I met on Ambergris Caye many years ago and I was there to help show how much we loved and respected him.
His oldest daughter, Carlita said, “Papi, Mary from The San Pedro Sun wants to write an article about the secret of your long life.”
“Hunh?” he said, as he adjusted his hearing aid. “She want to know my secret?”
Mary said, “Yes, Señor. I need to know your big secret.”
“Back in 1953,” Señor Garza said, “I am fishing around Turneffe when a sudden storm comes. The wind push my boat up on a tiny little caye with nothing there but a fisherman’s shack. Another fisherman show up and his boat been took by the storm so I get him inside and about dark we make a bed. We hung our clothes up to dry and huddle up to stay warm. Sometime in the night he kissed me on the back of the neck and that set us off. Whoo! What a night we had.”
Don Carlos took another drink of rum before he continued.
“In the morning a boat pass by and rescue us. Before he left, he kissed me and said he had to get back to his family. I never learnt his name and I ain’t never seen him again. That’s the big secret of my life.”
The horrified party guests sat with their mouths open.
“Oh, Señor Garza!” Mary said, “I meant the secret to your long, healthy life.”
Don Carlos said, “Oh, that’s just eat good, plenty rum and no worries.”

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