Readers, email your question to [email protected]. Your letters are edited solely for grammar, spelling, and length.
Dear Doctor Love,
Each time we come back to the island my husband and I are invited to dinner at a friends’ house. She is a sweet person, but she keeps a horribly dirty house.
The floors are literally sticky from ground-in food and spilled drinks. There are clothes lying around everywhere, smelly trash sits in bags on the floor, and once, I think I saw a dead mouse under the sink. The cats, about four of them, walk all over the counter and on top of the fridge and the litter box is never cleaned.
My friend is getting offended because I always come up with a lame reason to be busy that night, but I am running out of excuses. In other words, I am not as sickly as I am making her believe.
What can I do? I simply cannot imagine eating a meal there, I almost gag when I visit, and I keep those visits very few and very short.
/s/Losing my Lunch
Dear Lunch,
Messy is one thing, but unhygienic is another concern all together. You shouldn’t judge someone for putting a clean house lower on her list of priorities, but piling up trash, dirty litter boxes and dead vermin in the kitchen are not an appetizing way to start a meal.
If you don’t wish to offend your friend by using yet another lame excuse, the Doctor suggests one to cover all future visits—while you were away you discovered you have developed a sudden and severe allergy to cats.
Dear Doctor Love,
My son’s friend stole a toy from him, and though he has apologized and returned it after we spoke to his parents, I don’t want him in my house. My five-year-old is heart broken that his friend can no longer come over and play. What should I do?
/s/Once a Thief
Dear Thief
Adults view stealing as an unforgivable act, but you should try to remember that some common but inappropriate behaviors in young children are part of their growing up. It is around the age of five or six that children begin to understand what is theirs and what is not and by age eight they should be able to resist the impulse to steal.
The boy who took the toy is five-years-old. His parents were involved in the solution, and the toy returned with an apology. You should trust that both families have learned a valuable lesson from this incident.
Let the child come play in a supervised environment and with a limited number of toys and let him regain your trust.
