Tuesday, June 25, 2024

Wolfe’s Woofer: Mind Reader

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“Swimming naked is a pretty foolish idea,” Sherry said when I told her my story.
“I didn’t plan to do anything embarrassing when I left home this morning,” I said. “Nostalgia and the sunny weather made me look for that old swimming spot up north.”
I had parked the golf cart by the road and walked the trail to the beach.
This isolated area of shore is protected by a sandy point that kept the seaweed away, leaving a beautiful swimming area. I looked up and down the beach and didn’t see anyone, so I stripped out of my clothes and wrapped them in a ball. I put them next to a palm tree and waded out for a swim.
After a few enjoyable minutes of swimming, I began wading back to the shore. A dog came trotting up the beach and stopped to sniff my bundle of clothes.
“Hey, stop that!” I yelled.
The startled dog grabbed my clothes in his mouth and raced away, dropping them a hundred yards up the beach. As I trudged through the sand to retrieve them a little old lady stepped from the path and turned in my direction.
Grabbing an old bucket that had washed up on the beach, I held it up as cover.
“Uh—hello,” I said.
“Good morning,” she replied. She then looked at me closely and said, “Sir, I have a very special gift. I can read minds.”
“Are you telling me you know what I’m thinking?”
“You’re thinking that bucket has a bottom in it.”

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