Doctor Love: Desperate

Sunday, January 15th, 2017

Readers, please send your letters. They can be emails, formal letters or handwritten notes. They are edited solely for grammar and spelling. Also, they are sometimes edited for length.

Dear Doctor Love,
I know you are in San Pedro and I live on the mainland but I hope you can help me out.
My school is putting on a play in two weeks and I play the leading part. We have been rehearsing since the school term began and we have put a lot of work into it. When it began taking a lot of my after school time, my father said I had to keep my grades up or I would not be allowed to participate. My dad will never accept any grade lower than B and pretty much, I have done that but I got a B minus in one subject. My father grounded me, including being in the musical and I am freaking out.
My dad has always dreamed of me being the first person in my family to graduate from college. He will not listen to anything I say. He just keeps saying that a B minus will not get me into a good college. I have begged and cried. I have promised to be grounded until I am married if only he would understand that this is very important to a lot of people. I haven’t told my teacher yet because I am hoping to change my father’s mind. How can I make him understand that he is really wrong to make me drop out at the last minute?
/s/ Desperate

Dear Desperate,
Normally the Doctor would agree that your grades take priority over anything else and it’s true that your father made this clear from the beginning. However, in this instance, the Doctor’s considered opinion is that he may be dealing too harshly for the situation. Sit with your mother and father and calmly tell them how you intend to bring your grade up to meet your father’s expectations. Point out the areas where you will concentrate your efforts and what extra study you will do to turn the B minus into an A minus. Ask your teacher to tutor you or to arrange for projects that will allow you to make extra credit to bring your grade up. As a last resort, have your teacher speak to your father. Perhaps your teacher can make your dad see that you have a responsibility to many others in this project and that to walk away is not the adult thing to do. Adults, even your father, must shuffle their priorities all of the time and social skills are as necessary in life as good grades.

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